Learning when to say no is such a vital and important skill in life. I know this because I am constantly surrounded by people that cannot say no and suffer dearly for it.
I think it’s very simple: when you don’t want something, when you don’t agree with it, when you don’t like the situation, say “no“, not to be a nuisance but because your happiness should come first before other’s comfort.
You are the only one that controls your happiness, don’t thrust that into the hands of others that don’t give two flying monkeys about your emotions. What’s the word “no” going to do someone? It definitely won’t kill them. And if someone wants to cry to their mother about being given the “no” word, then just know that their momma didn’t raise ’em right! The best thing one can do when they’ve received the infamous “no” is…MOVE ON. Life’s fudging tougher than that, if you can’t handle a “no”…I actually have no consolation for you…
I’m a firm believer that when you’ve had enough of someone or something or someone asks you something and your options are yes/no, nothing, at any given point, should hold you back from utilising that free will and human right of saying “no“.
Saying “no” is one of life’s most important and valuable lessons. The quicker it’s learnt, the better. Stating when they’ve had enough, expressing your disagreement in any given situation, being able to say simple things like “You’re not part of the people that I invited to my party.” is your entitlement. And not because you’re just taking power in your hands and want to hurt people’s feelings but because you’re allowed to want things the way YOU want it. If you don’t want Tom, Dick and Harry coming to your house because they’re not the kind of people you associate with, you have the right to say so! We should be in a world where individuals can accept that with no grudges and just get on with life (but we don’t, however we are going to ignore this minute factor in this post).
What I feel it boils down to is that a lot of people will not be able to get far in life if they can’t say “no“, a lot of people will carry excess burden if they don’t learn to say “no”, a lot of people will be crying themselves to sleep every night because they struggle to mention the word “no”…and I can’t possibly think of a rational example where any of those scenarios are perfectly justified consequences. You may ask why? Well…BECAUSE THEY’RE NOT!
Being able to express your nos is so important. It stops people from just messing about with you, when and how they like, or thinking we can ask sososo for this because he/she never says “no”…nobody got far by being passive!
I shall reiterate. I am not saying that you should go round, left, right and centre declaring “no” to the world as if you will die tomorrow, but in certain situations…especially when you’ve had enough of that particular person just using and abusing you, remember that no is a shorter word than yes and it’s likely to have a more pleasant aftermath for yourself.
So, just like my mother says “The worse they can say is no.”